"The memoirs by Rev. Myouyou Yoshikawa, nun of HBS Brazil"

"The memoirs by Rev. Myouyou Yoshikawa, nun of Brazil"

This memoirs is by Myouyou Yoshikawa, Yuka Yoshikawa who became a nun at Brazil HBS.

Her transparent spirituality is a precious treasure of this world.

I will officially show off this sentence later.

However, HBS began a tough training period for one month from today.

I am convinced that her memoirs will be encouraging for many people.

So I posted it here.

While I was staying in Brazil, she wrote this memoirs in response to my request.

I got this sentence from her on the last day.

I was deeply moved by reading this in the plane to Switzerland.

Her experience of faith is truly wonderful, surely you will be moved and will cry.

It becomes embarrassing about our way of faith.

She is pure and honest.

And she has a clever wisdom.

Moreover, her husband and family's faith are also wonderful.

HBS and HBS priests should be like this.

They are examples of us.

This is Premodial Buddhism.

Let 's do our best to practice from tomorrow!

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"The memoirs by Rev. Myouyou Yoshikawa, nun of Brazil"

Arigatougozaimassu 

My name is Myouyou Yoshikawa. I am a buddhist nun, disciple of Takassaky Nitiguen Shounin, and I assist Nikkyoji Catedral, in São Paulo, Brazil.

I wasn't born into a buddhist family. Even so, I received countless goriyakus all my life. Of course, if you see from a secular perspective, you may say I have had some bad times. Although, I don't see it that way. 

When I first met Ricardo Yoshikawa, my husband, he told me: "If one day we have a serious relationship, you have to become a buddhist. I will not raise my child in any other religion." Then, even reluctantly, I started to come to Nikkyoji.

My mother-in-law was always very active in Nikkyoji. With her, I learned how to make gohoukos, but I still didn't accept the doctrine completely. Because of my ignorance in religious matters, there were a lot of doctrinal issues that I couldn´t understand, although I thought were essential to the comprehension of the religion. "Why do we keep repeating the same thing (Namumyouhourenguekyou)? What is in the Lotus Sutra? Who guarantees that Buddha really said that? Why do you consider yourself Buddhist, and not Nichirenist, since we only hear about Nichiren? Why the services are celebrated in Japanese, if no one can understand? Why do we offer incense if dead people do not smell? Why do we offer food if they do not eat?". The only thing they told me was: "Chant the odaimoku, and you will know!" This is a very difficult mindset for a catholic person. I was not satisfied.

And so the years went by. Even after we married, in 2010, I kept coming to Nikkyoji only because I was forced to. I admired the faith of my husband, who daily woke up earlier to do okyuji, and offered his prayers every morning and night, without fail. But I was always too busy looking for professional success, and on weekends I always thought I deserved a bit of leisure. I was tired, afterall.

One day, I needed something to have faith on. My grandmother was sick. As my family lives in another city, there was nothing I could do for them. I had no choice. The buddhist altar of my house is big, and impossible to be ignored. So I sat down and chanted the Odaimoku. I was feeling sad and weak, but I did it with all my sincerity.

My prayer was fulfilled. And my faith made me stronger. 

Odaimoku transformed my heart. From that moment, I began to perceive small details where the Dharma is present, but usually we do not perceive. The rain that fell on the rigth time. An unexpected encounter that brought a solution to anguish. A setback that caused a happy coincidence. One more moment we had lived with a loved one. A delay that prevented an accident. It seems silly to say, but in fact, everything is goriyaku. But people are not aware of it.

I want people to know it. I want everyone to have the opportunity to realize the invisible line that connects us all.

I majored in Fashion Design. When the idea of becoming a (buddhist nun?) kyomusan came to mind for the first time, I was Production Manager, and my job was to ensure that manufacturing processes run reliably and efficiently in our factories in China. It gave me the opportunity to visit and live in other countries, but Fashion Market is also the higher ephemeral point of our consumer society. My job was to cheapen the costs of production, to increase the company's revenue, without caring about the consequences in the lives of those people. It is a cruel and superficial market. I had finally achieved what other people consider as professional success, but I used to cry while driving back home. I used to practice Buddhism in the temple, but not in my everyday life. How could this be worth it? 

I thought about it for almost a year. In the meantime, my husband and I went on vacation to Japan. We tried to go every morning to the Morning Service (asamairi) in the city where we were staying. Altogether, we visited six HBS temples in Kyoto, Osaka, Tokyo, Yokohama and Chiba. This strengthened my decision greatly. I was determined to go to the next Vocational Meeting (an annual event dedicated for the followers that happens annually, so that they may experiment the priestly life), which happened five months later, at the Hoshoji Temple in Rio de Janeiro, during the carnival.

Takassaky Odoshi had just been elected and had just begun performing his role as Brazil HBS Archbishop. Until then, he was Ryushoji Temple's Odoshi, in Mogi das Cruzes. By that time, I didn't know him very well, though I always had sympathy for him beyond words. In a conversation during the Vocational Meeting in Rio, he told us about his point of view about women exercising the priesthood. He spoke directly to my heart.

Returning to São Paulo, I talked to my husband about this idea.

The confirmation came when I asked my husband: "And what do we do when we have children? How are we going to raise them?" - and he calmly replied: "Yuka, if one day we have enough virtues to have children, and if Takassaky Odoshi accepts you as his disciple, it will not be us who will decide how we will raise them. Your master will decide it, and it's up to us to follow his directions". 

At that moment I realized I had his support. He was also ready.

My master's response did not come quickly. He told me he needed to talk to his superiors, and asked me to wait. I confess I was worried. In case they denied me just because I am a married woman, would I be able to keep my faith? Is that why we didn't see any priestesses in Japan? How could I believe in a religion that forbids women from being equal with men?

So I started the Hyappon Kigan 百本祈願 (Hundred-fold Prayer Chanting). 

My master suggested me to do Hyappon Kigan in the temple, and I did it with joy. Even though no one knew the reason why I was doing it, more people joined the Hyappon Kigan. Altogether, I believe that seven or eight people also dedicated themselves to intensive chanting, and this made me very happy.

Receiving the positive response from Takassaky Odoshi, it was time to communicate the family. My mother, who is not a HBS follower, was frightened. She thought I was brainwashed. This happened even in my husband's family, who inherited the religion, and who already has two other HBS priests.

I confess that I still do not understand why are there so few priestesses in HBS, and why my decision causes so much astonishment. I was raised by women, I can not see reasons to think my abilities are different from man's abilities. My life is not more valuable than theirs. I am aware that I am not doing anything so surprising that the other priests have not done it before me, maybe in a more praiseworthy way. My abdication is no greater than theirs abdication, and my decision is not more valuable than theirs decision.

Fortunately, today everyone is in peace with my decision.

I started as minarai (apprentice) on March 15, 2016, at the age of 29. It was Mimaki Odoshi's posthumous anniversary (shoutsuki meiniti), and so on December 4, I was named Myouyou (妙養), in honor of this Bishop (his priest name was Jyun-you 淳養), who did so much for Brazil's HBS development.

During my minarai period, my master treated me like any other apprentice. A few weeks later another person also started as a priesthood apprentice, but he gave up a few months later. Even so, I feel that the time he spent here was also a blessing for me. We became friends, and he helped me a lot, especially in the first few months, when I went through my first ordeal (painful experience) ...

Shortly after the officialization of my admission to the temple, I found myself pregnant, but I lost the child three months later. For most of people it could be considered as a sad fact, but I think that somehow it strengthened me and my husband. We're better now. Although it was a fact that marked us a lot, I don't believe anything happens as a matter of chance. I know that, one day, a woman will need to hear something that only I, that have also been through it, can tell her. That's why I do not feel sad. It strengthens me and gives me reason to continue.

Even after the Priestly Ordination (tokudoshiki), I feel like I am still in the learning process. Everyday something happens in the temple. Every day, it is possible to take a lesson from something. Every day, it is possible to perceive something new. Because I am already an adult, I try to make a difference by observing everything carefully, and I try to keep doing my best.

With that certainty, I try to devote each day of my life, which I desire to dedicate to the Dharma until the last day. I feel that i need to be able to tell people about the Buddha's teachings. I want everyone to see what I see, that every detail of our life is a concrete blessing, and every situation is worthy of gratitude.

If, even despite my ignorance, I can help show it to just one other person, it will already have been worth it.